Goodbye Friend

I thought I would just write a little something and dedicate it to my longest and dearest friend. She is moving soon, and although I am excited for her and the possibilities that lie in her future, I can't help but feel a piece of me will soon be missing. Tonight we were talking about the "good ole days". Living across the street from each other growing up has been a pleasure. We talked about the hot summer nights of laying under the stars on my driveway, talking till the wee morning hours, remembering how we would trap beetles in jars, run through sprinklers, playing dress up in her grandma's old dresses and having picnics with our stuffed animals. We used to play barbies together as small children, and she would always get mad at me that I had to be Jasmine. We went on many trips together growing up. I can even remember the time I accidentally threw away her retainer. Boy was she mad. Since she was older she taught me how to shave my legs, how not to be the target of bullies in Jr. High and even what becoming a women was all about. We would go for drives, talk about boys, rescue each other from bad boyfriends and crazy situations. She was even in my wedding. Most importantly she was there for me through my divorce. I will never forget the day she came to me with a sack full of chocolate and told me to let it all out. I will be forever grateful for that day, and the support that she has always given me.

Although you are moving, and I will no longer get to see you as often as I would like, no one can take the memories we shared together and the times that we have had. I know we will have many more days together in the future and for that I am grateful. From diapers to depends, we will always be friends. Love you Jenn.

Lost in London

Vacations are meant to be fun, exciting, and eventful. Getting lost, however, wasn't really on my agenda.

I recently got back from the United Kingdom, where I spent a few days in London. I was visiting a friend who was studying abroad, and so I should have known going into this adventure that I would be doing a lot of site seeing myself. After all, I got myself there all by myself, why would touring London and cities in close proximity be any different.

My story takes place at the hour of 7:00 PM. My friend informed me that her class was attending a play that night, a play that was sold out mind you, so I was on my own for the evening. Well I had been site seeing earlier alone, so this shouldn't be any different.... well it was.

I decided to go to West Minster Abby, and head along the river Thames. Well somewhere in between the two I got distracted. Distracted by non other than anti-war hippies. I say hippies in the most loving way possible. I thought to myself, I bet they are interesting enough people I shall go and make new friends. And make new friends I did. We talked briefly, about the War and dread locks, and then I decided to kindly bid them farewell. In my effort to escape I realized that I had lost my way. It was a terrible thing to happen at the time, considering it had now just started to rain.

I thought I was wise to try and find an underground train station, but this proved to be in vain. For I had no idea where the nearest one was. I walked, and walked and can I guess...I walked some more. ALAS!!!! THE UNDERGROUND SIGN!!!! FINALLY, my night was starting to look up! I got on the train that I thought would lead me back to the dorms in which I was staying, but sadly I had stepped onto the wrong one. Its ok, I kept telling myself I will just get off on the next exit....well it was a bank holiday and the next three stops were closed. AH CRAP! This is not good!

My train finally stopped in Euston. Well I guess since I have no idea how to get back I will just head west and hope I will back it back home. I don't think this was a great idea, since it was late (around 8:45 by this time) raining, and I was in a very bad area. This was a dead give away when a man no older than myself came up to me and said, "Whats a pretty little thing like you doing in a place like this?" First thought was, what would I be willing to sacrifice in my attempt to throw something at his head, knocking him unconscious. Well, I was willing to sacrifice nothing, so I decided to just walk faster.

15 minutes past and it was raining harder, my map had somehow flown away in the wind, and my phone was now dead. To top it all off, I wasn't sure if I was even going the right way anymore.

I stopped into a grocery store and asked the man to help me. "How far away is baker street?" He looked at me like I was an idiot. "Baker Street? Well young lady you are a long ways away, 45 min walk at least." AH CRAP! NO way!! "PLEASE SIR how do I get to the nearest tube station?" After a few minutes of him telling me, go this way take a right, then this way, left, left again, right, another right, maybe go this way, I was able to manage my way to the tube station.

As soon as I got there I went to the information desk and asked them how to get home. "Well take this train to this station, get off, take this train to this station, transfer here, go to here, and then transfer and that should lead you to your stop." I hope I can remember all this, if not it will be a long night of train riding for me.

FINALLY I made it home!!! You think my story ends there, don't you? Well it doesn't. I was tired, wet and really cranky. I get to the gate to the college and it doesn't open, I try again. NOTHING! What is a girl to do? No way into the college. A brillant plan came to mind, and I stood there for many moments trying to see if I could actually pull it off. What the heck. I will climb the fence. I haven't climbed a fence since I was a youngster, and in flip flops this proved to be a harder feat than I had realized. Once over I headed for my friends dorm room, where, yes my key didn't work. After much fight it finally opened and I was safe from the world!

All I needed was a nice hot shower to fix all my woes. I grab my shower items and head for the women shower. I get in, start the lather process on my hair and.....the shower breaks. No more water. NONE. I am left in the cold, shampoo in my hair, soup all over, and a towel as big as a wash cloth to dry myself with. This is the point of the night where I just sat down and cried. I cried, and cried and cried. Never before had I felt so far away from home.

So many lessons can be learned from this experience. First, never get distracted by hippies, second, Never go to Euston, three don't be an idiot, and four these days are going to happen, at least it makes a good story for later.

Mel gets a Spray Tan

Yesterday I had my first spray tan. Although this might not seem like an interesting topic to write about, I learned something from my experience.
My roommate talked me into this crazy idea, and at first I will say, I did not want to do this. What if I come out looking like an ompa-lumpa? Dozens of sinerios passed through my head as I was debating whether or not to do this. What if the sprayer is clogged and it comes out in big puffs of orange mist? What if I forget the steps and I tan one side more than the other? What if I slip and fall and as a result come out with only a tan bottom? After some thought to this, I decide, what the heck, I might as well try it! And if something does go wrong, I won't be leaving my apartment for four to six weeks, no biggie!
The day finally arrived, and my roommate thought it to be a good idea to show me a "how to" video. I am not sure if this made things worse, but it was pretty intense. Do this position, turn and do this position, then this one, and then that one...then there is the drying! How on earth will I rememeber all this! It was too late now, we already had appointments, and I was determinded to swallow my fear of looking like the dark haired version of Tara Reid.
Once we arrived, I was really starting to get nervous. Really over a spray tan?? Well, nevertheless, I wasn't feeling to confident. We walk in, and of course there is the typical tan female behind the counter. We both decided to get what they like to call the "cocktail". Sounds interesting right? Well it was. First you tan, then you get your spray tan. Once the tanning part of over (in which I am a pro) I was ready for my spray tan. The female tan worker takes my roommate and I back to the spray chamber, as I like to call it. No turning back now! She steps in and shows us the positions that we are to do when in there. I ask her where the panic button is, and tell my roommate to STAND BY! This could get ugly. After they leave, it is just me and the spray machine. I kept thinking, I can do this, I can do this. First shower cap, second apply the lotion to your hands and feet so as not to get those tan.
It was time to puch the start button, and I started having anxiety. Thousands of people get spray tans everyday, so why was I having such a hard time? Well, despite my better judgment, I pushed the start bottom and held my breath. It started spraying my first side, and had it not been so disturbingly cold, I think I would have been alright, but I made a face. The worst possible thing you could do during a spray tan. Oh the lines that will be on my face!!! I start to panic, what is the next step! Crap what do I do?? What side do I do first? How are my hands suppose to be? Well for the next three min, I just decided to wing it. Boy did I pay the price for that four to six hours later.
Not only was it cold, but the dryer didn't do much drying. I wanted to just remain naked and walk out. I mean, couldn't putting on clothes make it all blotchy? I dressed and went outside where my roommate was waiting, "You didn't even scream!" She said. Little did she know, the horrible look on my face as my forehead started to get sprayed. Great, all I needed was squint tanning lines by my eyes!
Well, after all was said and done, we went home to wait and see how dark we would become. Hour after hour I could see the color starting.
I don't think it looks dreadful, but my hands are orange, my feet orange, I have awesome tan lines on my arms, and a few on my face.
I guess its exciting to try something new, even if it is just a spray tan, but lessons I learn are as follows: 1. never make a face while getting a spray tan 2. always make sure to NOT face your palms to the sprayer, 3. Don't put hair cap half on your ears and half off. and finally 4. Never under any circumstances inhale deeply while getting a spray tan I am pretty sure I lost a few brain cells, and I don't know about you, but I can't spare them.
Will I ever get another spray tan? Maybe...but with these important lessons learned, I will come out looking more like a tanning bed model, rather than a jersey shore actor.

When the romance is gone, move on...

I learned this very catchy phrase from a red box rental video, and it made me think. Do relationships really work? I have been known to argue that relationships are indeed cages repressing your inner most being. I like to think that putting a time frame on dating is a smart plan. Date for only a certain amount of time, and then cut it, before you can get too attached, and before you can get hurt, because lets face it, it sucks going out with someone and then you never get a phone call after. Maybe the romance was done before you actually knew that it was? Who knows for sure, but this is a phenomenon that I am determined to get to the bottom of. When you think things are going so well, why does it end? Maybe for a time you're excited to go out with that certain boy you met at a coffee shop, your eager to get to know him. Your trying on five different shirts and taking pictures of each and sending them to your friend to ask her opinion. Your asking your roommate, which pair of pants make my butt look really good! But after a few dates, your hands no longer get sweaty, the butterflies that once resided in your stomach have now taken flight, in hopes of finding a new stomach in which to live, and you no longer have that need to freshen your breath before you go out. What goes wrong? What makes the "romance" disappear? Have we just gotten over the way they chew their food, or the fact that he never opens the car door for you, or did he finally drop a story about his ex girlfriend? This could be part of it, but what did you do wrong that made him want to move on? Did I snort when I laughed? Did I talk while chewing my food? Did I accidentally check out the waiter when we were being seated for dinner? So many things one could do to doom a relationship from the start, but I guess the real question is, why does all romance fizzle?


P.S. Don't ever google "worms in human head" you will not be happy with the results. Don't say I didn't warn you.

About Me

Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Melanie Wood, 25 years young very close to 26, and I am starting a blog for the sheer fact that life is funny, and every day something happens that makes me either smile or grit my teeth. Either way it could make for fun and interesting reading.
A little background on myself so you may better understand my rantings, I will give you the nutshell version, so as not to loose your interest. I am a Utah native, divorce a few years back, easily entertained, I talk constantly, I think I am pretty funny most of the time, I love animals, family oriented very picky with many things such as : men, food, men, but not my diet coke. Diet Coke never fails me. Currently I am going to the U for my English degree, I love to read, and we will see how decent I am at writing.
Likes include: being outdoors, eating, reading, hanging out friends, and my best friend my puppy (best looking French Bulldog you will ever see) camping, being with family, traveling.
I am on a path of self discovery, and starting this blog might increase my changes of figuring out where exactly this path will lead me. We shall see.